The Top Ten Reasons To Vote For Obama 2012

I’ve limited my list to only those reasons stated by Obama’s official campaign, an administration spokesperson, or uttered by President Obama himself.

Here we go.

10.  Will Ferrell will eat anything (“garbage, hair, human toenails”) if you vote for Obama.  The idea of using your civic duty to pay for the degradation of a fellow-man is funny, right?

9.   Mitt Romney wants to cut investments in alternative energy.  For this reason to make sense, then cutting investments in alternative energy must be a bad thing.  Nevermind the fact that cronies are wasting other people’s money; you have to think like a true believer here.

8.  President Obama coined the term “Romnesia,” which is both witty and devastating for Mitt Romney, because he forgets things.  President Obama doesn’t forget things.  Except maybe this or this . . . or this.  Also, it appears Obama didn’t coin the term after all.  Hmm, maybe I should move on.

7.  Who can forget Attack Waaaaatch?  Okay, technically the campaign used only one “a” for this nifty little idea to tattle on fellow citizens who criticize the President.  Nowadays, though, the parody is all that is left of the original website.  The more congenial “Truth Team” has replaced it, leaving only the website address as a reminder of bolder times.

6. Obama says you should vote for him for one very simple reason: revenge.  I’m sure this is not any attempt to foment class resentment or anything.  It’s not class warfare, it’s math.  Revenge math.

Hoo, I’m halfway through already?  It must be time to list the really substantive reasons why President Obama should be reelected . . .

5.  All vaginas and uteri depend on Barack Obama.  Maybe this notion sounds silly to you.  If so, let me explain its true meaning:  President Obama is zealously pro-business, assuming your business is an abortion clinic.

4.  If this election is your first, then you should vote for Barack Obama because your first vote is a lot like the first time you have sex.  And having sex with Obama is better than having sex with Mitt Romney.  Okay.  I need a shower now.

3.  Obama should get your vote because his speeches come from his loins.  Ew, I’m still needing that shower.  Maybe . . . this isn’t really a reference to presidential genitals.  I mean, who talks about loins anyway, outside a cheesy romance novel?  You know, “Girding your loins“ means preparing for the worst.  I think Axelrod accidentally telegraphed the fact that Obama is preparing to lose.

2.  Obama is willing to use expletives while publicly name-calling his opponent.  This is a great reason for the edgy, Rolling Stone-reading, first-time voting, rock-and-roll-lifestyling set to choose Obama, assuming they weren’t all won over by Lena Dunham’s sex joke.

Oh dear.  I have more than one reason left, but I’ve already reached the number one.  What to do, what to do?  Math is so hard.

The three number one reasons to vote for Obama:

1(a).  The beautiful people have told us to vote for him.  They have way more fashion sense than we do, you know.

1(b).  Osama bin Ladin is still dead.

1(c).  Obama says that Al Qaeda has been “decimated.”  Given the chance, Ambassador Stevens, Tyrone Woods, Glenn Doherty, and Sean Smith might have begged to differ on this.  Prayers for their grieving loved ones.

Two more days to go, folks.  Two.  More.  Days.

 

Obama Walking the Plank of His Own Making. Fellow Democrats Sawing Plank.

Schadenfreude.  It’s what’s for dinner.

Democrats are running away from Obamacare, which will likely be ruled unconstitutional in June.

Sen. Jim Webb said the law would be Obama’s “biggest downside” in the election and had cost him “a lot of credibility as a leader.”

Some of us were at your office, providing such advice to this affect during the run up to this vote, Jimmy.  I saw you walking down the hallway towards your office and once you saw us gathered outside your office you ran from us.  We were there and we were ignored.  Now you hike up your skirt and run away from a re-election bid because you know you screwed up big time.

No worries though, mate.  We’ll release the same fury against your replacement candidate, Timmy Kaine, that we would have on you.  Timmy is a big Obama guy.  Big Obama guys don’t do so well with the electorate since 2008.

And then there’s this from former Congressman Artur Davis from Alabama.

“I think the Affordable Care Act is the single least popular piece of major domestic legislation in the last 70 years,” he said. “It was not popular when it passed; it’s less popular now.”

And now Democrats are running away from President Obama’s blockage of the Keystone XL Pipeline.  Funny how constituent feedback about the pain at the pump brings new wisdom to even the most radically green Democrats.

Sharks are swirling below the plank.  Sharks of Obama’s own creation.  Shutting down and restricting coal fired power plants isn’t going to help, either.  When electricity rates ‘necessarily skyrocket’ (your words, not mine) going into the cooling season, this will add more pressure.  Coal fired power plants are shutting down because of Obama.

When GSA employees lavishly waste taxpayer money and flaunt it on You Tube, that doesn’t help either. 

When Obama uses the Justice Department to promote illegal gun running resulting in the deaths of American border and ICE agents and this Justice Department turns a blind eye to voter intimidation perpetrated by the Black Panthers while harassing states over voter ID laws and immigration enforcement laws, that doesn’t help either.

When Obama racks up $5 Trillion in debt in 3 years, tosses our money at pet projects that are massive failures like Solyndra, LightSquared, and others, that doesn’t help either.

When Obama takes an unprecedented number of vacations while the ranks of the unemployed moved from gainful employment and self esteem onto demeaning government dependency, well that don’t much help, either.

You know what, Champ?  You’re doomed.  If your cratering poll numbers don’t advise you, then your own party distancing themselves from you certainly does.

America’s got a big party planned for November 6th. 

You’re not invited.

 

 

Who Says There is No Growth Under Obama?

The number of people on Federal Disability has DOUBLED during his 3 inglorious years.  5.4 Million people have been added to the roles since his presidency, putting the total at 10.8 million.

Yes, that 10.8 million people with a vested interest in growing the size of government.  I suspect many of these people are not so disabled that they won’t be able to hobble to the polls in November to vote to keep themselves a meal ticket.

And don’t get me wrong.  My snark is not directed against those who truly are disabled and are truly deserving.  But I know that some people get disability due to substance dependency, of all things.  So, we should really give them the money to continue their lifestyles.

More people riding

 

Happy Tax Day!! Pay Up, Suckers.

Your tax dollars are required to fund the important business of government.  Stop complaining.

And don’t ask us any questions.  We are government and we make our own rules.

The only problem with government, according to Democrats, is that we just don’t have enough of it.  Hence….Obamacare.

Now get back to work.

 

Raise my debt limit

h/t: Pedro

 

What we’re up against. It ain’t pretty.

Bill Whittle does the math on the upcoming election in his latest Firewall called ‘The Vote Pump’.  You won’t like the answer because you already know it.  Whittle just shows you the picture in a new and refreshing way.

Declaration Entertainment link.

 

Go Big or Go Bust

The so-called “Super Committee”, charged with first agreeing on and then proposing deficit reductions of at least $1.5 trillion in a matter of a few weeks, is being lobbied to Go Big by the Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget, an offshoot of the New America Foundation, a non-partisan think tank. The gist of their argument is that the American fiscal situation and pending debt crisis is the most predictable disaster in history. They also believe solving this problem will require a minimum of $4 trillion in deficit reduction over the next 10 years. Furthermore they believe that the “Super Committee” has a unique opportunity to go big by taking advantage of the work already done by the Simpson-Bowles deficit reduction committee and adopting their proposal.

Given the short time frame the committee has been given to agree on a resolution and the magnitude of the pending crisis I think this is the right course. David Cote, the CEO of Honeywell and Simpson-Bowles member, put it this way,“We all know this will get resolved and it will get resolved in one of two ways. One, is we can do it now thoughtfully and proactively the way grownups do things. The other way is to wait until it gets to a point the bond market decides they don’t trust you anymore.” The latter will result in an escalation of interest rates not only for government borrowing but mortgages, vehicle loans and credit cards which will create a huge drag on the economy.

 

Marco Rubio Delivers The Undeniable Truth

The freshman Senator penned an op-ed for the Miami Herald and produced this video version, it speaks for itself.

 

Senator Tom Coburn – “The Time for Leadership is Now!”

There is a commercial for the Postal Service in which an apathetic employee is questioned about spending more than he has to for shipping and he replies “It’s not my money and I really do not care”. Well, yesterday Senator Coburn appeared on Cavuto on the Fox News channel and while discussing waste, fraud, and abuse he was asked how and why is this happening on such a rampant scale and his opinion was it happens because “we have people who are spending not their own money, somebody elses and it’s not as important.”

The Senator then went on to once again explain the depth and severity of our debt crisis and the urgency required to reform entitlements saying, “Here’s the question. Is there anyone in America, who knows what our financial situation is, that thinks Medicare going to be the same five years from now as it is today? The answer is that it is a financial impossibility.”

Cavuto then questioned whether politicians will have the will to fix the problem or will they retreat in an effort to get re-elected and Coburn replied, “If that’s the case our country is toast”.

Finally the senator surmised that if we are to avoid a debt crisis we must act boldly and quickly, “The time for leadership is now”.

 

Representative David Schweikert Cuts Through The Political Theater. Can We Handle The Truth?

Congressman David Scwheikert R-AZ made an appearance on CSPAN’s Washington Journal and delivered a sobering message of impending financial collapse if we do not heed the clarion call for dramatic changes in our national fiscal policy. Schweikert, who served Arizona in both the state legislature and as a Maricopa County Treasurer, is advocating a multipronged effort of spending cuts, tax reform (a broader base, lower marginal rates, and eliminating credits and deductions and promotes economic growth), and reform or repeal of regulations which impede economic growth.

The freshman refuses to be distracted by those standards of modern political theater such as claiming we can eliminate the deficit by eliminating tax cuts for the rich or tax credits for big oil and cites the math. His focus on the single greatest threat to our nation, our deficit and increasing debt, is unwavering. Because it can be difficult for most of us to get our head wrapped around the huge numbers in our current budgets he cleverly breaks down various budget items to the minute and helps define the true impact associated with some common folklore.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

In 2010 many of us stated that we would support courageous legislators who were willing to present the facts and solutions to cure our ills. We were disgusted with those in the political class who were more concerned with getting re-elected than being responsible. Mr. Schweikert is a courageous freshman congressman who is honestly defining our situation and working to enact proven conservative solutions. He is making a sincere effort to educate his constituency but he refuses to pander. He is the real deal and he deserves our support.