How does that old joke go?

27 Mar

If I could knit me one of those I’d never leave the house.

This encounter in front of the Supreme Court made the whole trip worthwhile.

Having been educated by this woman I decided to go looking and sure enough, there is a whole knitting campaign cranking out female body parts and they all have the look, the feel of cotton. The fabric of our lives.

Some call it Government-free VJJ, some call it the Snatchel Project. I think that Jerry Seinfeld would call it a ‘Mulva-lution’.

But these knitters also do cervixeseses and clitoriseseses. Pluralization of female body parts is a bit of a problem for me. Like Breasteseses.

On the penultimate latter, the clitoriseseses, maybe silk would be a preferred medium, or at least Alpaca. Just making a suggestion. I mean, if you’re going to be so kind as to go to the trouble of knitting me one and all, silk would be my preference.

Not like I’m picky or anything.


I’m starting to think about Christmas gifts. So get knittin’ you knittin’ beehotches.

Exit question: Are there any Republican women out there knitting Mitt Romney a pair? Something in a heavy hemp, something weather resistant and burlap-y would be most helpful. Perhaps a Double Purl Bobble and a Puff Stitch with a bit of barbed wire.

Yeah. I speak knittin’.

And Governor McDonnell? Sorry you lost out. No knitted Ute for You.


Posted by on March 27, 2012 in politics


8 responses to “How does that old joke go?

  1. Deadman

    March 27, 2012 at 11:50 pm

    Uterus is a simple second declension noun, so the Latin plural is uteri.
    Anyway, let me get this straight, the Republicans don’t want to each woman to have compulsorily mandated health insurance, so this is somehow a repugnant assault on each woman’s independent control of her own body, right?

    • P. Henry Saddleburr

      March 28, 2012 at 7:06 am

      Thanks for the English lesson. I was thinking uteri, but I had one too many eyeseses.

    • Matt Morgan

      March 30, 2012 at 11:55 am

      Actually they are doing this to protest the Republicans that are trying to take away birth control, or I should say, make them pay for it themselves, while letting men still get Viagra for free.

      • P. Henry Saddleburr

        March 30, 2012 at 3:55 pm

        Nobody is getting anything for free, and if you think that Obamacare will be free like the rest of the idiots at the Supreme Court proObamacare rally you’re a moron too. They do this to protect their precious ABORTIONS.

  2. Pedro

    March 28, 2012 at 8:46 am

    Here you go Saddlesore…

  3. Pedro

    March 28, 2012 at 8:46 am

    I meant Saddleburr.


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